Do you feel somewhat uncomfortable every time you go to a social event? Do you get extremely nervous when you have to converse with someone you just met? If you answer yes to these questions, it is probably because you are a shy person.
A shy person is defined as someone who experiences extreme embarrassment and insecurity in most of their social interactions. In fact, they often have a chronic fear of carrying out actions such as having a conversation with someone or approaching people who are not usually part of their social circle, since they think they will end up making a fool of themselves. It is normal that finally when something as simple as going out with your friends or meeting new people costs you so much, there comes a time when you cannot bear this situation and you wonder how to stop being shy. At OneHOWTO we care about you and for this reason, in the following article, we will give you some tips that will help you improve your personality. Keep reading!
Find out where your shyness comes from
The first step to stopping being shy is to try to understand what are the triggers that cause this trait since it is quite difficult to fight something that you do not know. In this way, you will be able to observe what thoughts are those that precede these emotions of discomfort and insecurity and prevent them from becoming a pattern of behavior.
To make it much easier, you can try to make a list of the situations in which you are mostly shy and that cause you that shame or anxiety, that is, the circumstances in which you react with shyness. If you are not very clear about how to make this list, then we will help you to do it by answering this series of questions:
- Do I react shyly every time I go out to a social event occasionally or is it something that happens to me all the time?
- Am I afraid to only interact with people I don’t know?
- In a conversation with friends, do I avoid speaking or giving my opinion because I think I am going to make a fool of myself?
- Do I feel this shame or insecurity only with people I’m attracted to or admire?
Admit that you are a shy person
The next step to stopping being shy is precisely to recognize that you are. For example, if you are with someone you just met or with a group of friends where there are new people, you can say something like: “If I don’t talk much, it’s because I ‘m a shy person and it’s hard for me to express my opinions.” In this way, we will be taking a bit of seriousness away from the matter and you will be more relaxed, practically unconsciously, since you will not have to make a great effort to hide who you are.
It is very common to fall into the mistake that when we do not like something about our personality, trying to fight against that trait or emotion, when in reality we should try to accept ourselves as we are and if we want to modify it to a certain degree, for example, if we want to be Less shy, then work it out.
Increase your self-esteem to stop being shy
It is very common for many shy people to have a tendency to undervalue or have a negative evaluation of themselves. This is seen, for example, when there is a debate between friends and that person chooses not to intervene in the conversation because he is extremely afraid of being rejected and even humiliated. That is, he is assuming that his opinion or his way of seeing things does not have the same value as that of others.
If you feel identified with it, it is very important that you dedicate some work to increasing your self-esteem and starting to love yourself more. The more confident and valuable you create, the less shy you’ll be in the future, but the opposite extreme isn’t healthy either.
We recommend this other oneHOWTO article on How to increase your self-esteem.
Don’t be so self-demanding
Being self-critical and somewhat self-demanding is not bad, as it helps you see your mistakes and learn from them. However, it is also a mistake to submit to constant self-criticism because there will come a time when the expectations that you have formed for yourself are impossible to achieve. Perfectionism is also a very common trait in shy people and is characterized by being highly demanding of themselves or seeing even the slightest flaw in something we have done.
To stop being shy, it is also essential that you are not so perfectionist and self-demanding, since too high levels of demand will only reduce your self-esteem and prevent your development and make you feel fulfilled. Remember that humans have flaws.
Do activities that help you stop being shy
In addition to the above advice, another very useful recommendation for those who need to correct this trait is to look for activities that help increase self-confidence such as dancing, theater, or learning a new language. In this way, you will learn to do something new and also interact with new people who share the same interest in that particular activity, so you will feel more receptive when sharing your opinions.
You can also start playing a new sport or go to a gym, as this way you will be increasing your confidence, reducing stress and anxiety and you will also be able to meet new people.
If you want to read more articles similar to How to stop being shy, we recommend you visit our Friendship category.